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Loving Men More, Needing Men Less

About the Book

Loving Men More, Needing Men Less

A New Approach to Love

Enough about men! It's about women! The days of negotiating, translating, and mediating are over. After more than a decade of fixating on "needs" and arbitrating the terms of their "love" relationships, women are embarking on a new era. Dr. Judith Sills asserts that, "women are finally powerful enough to love without losing themselves in the process," and as a result, they are reclaiming emotional strength, and working towards more gratifying relationships.

Making Changes

In Loving Men More, Needing Men Less, Dr. Sills charts the course of the emotional passage that's underway. She states that love, the ever elusive "chip of enlightenment," is finally within reach. Women—married or single, searching for love or yearning to rediscover it—are beginning to reach a point of balance between loving and needing men. This subtle yet pervasive shift is a transformation in spirit, and by employing the tools of refocusing, reframing, and responding, women will begin to bring themselves closer to love. Loving him more and needing him less is an easy concept to misunderstand since "love" and "need" are buzzwords from the last thirty years of struggle. However, Dr. Sills explains:


  • Needing a man less does not mean having fewer needs. It means looking beyond men to satisfy those needs.
  • Loving a man more means sympathizing with what he wants or needs but not that you always have to give it to him.
  • Opening up to love a man more is not meant as a gift to him but as a reward for yourself.


Combining her training and experience as a clinical psychologist with practical advice, Dr. Sills outlines the path that will take women to a higher ground. She asserts, "Needing less and loving more is the newly balanced emotional center towards which women are heading."

Has Dr. Sills really launched a new women's movement towards achieving fulfilling love? Is change on the horizon? Loving Men More, Needing Men Less is sure to spark debate among women.

Loving Men More, Needing Men Less
by Judith Sills

  • Publication Date: March 1, 1997
  • Paperback: 256 pages
  • Publisher: Penguin (Non-Classics)
  • ISBN-10: 0140242236
  • ISBN-13: 9780140242232